Tag Archive | Christmas Lights

Hogmanay Memory Lane (Part 2)

I have made a gallery of the most evocative photographs of 2013 for me.  It was Pup’s year and so he features quite a bit.  I had a life changing experience over the summer – represented by two images not previously shared here – the misty morning view of Kirrie Hill was taken the morning I launched the Steps Tay Health walks; I shared that picture with a special person.  The following week I saw this strange start to a rainbow which went on to be a rare double rainbow; I did not find out for a few days but that was the day that special person died – totally unexpectedly.  Three days later there was what I can only describe as a Rainbow storm (15 rainbows in 3 hours many of them double and/or supernumerary).  Finally organising the Christmas Market is represented by the tree and finishing with my boys curled up with the Cairn over the Christmas break.

It has been quite a year all in all.  I am still not in work so financially life remains tough; including having to fight to keep my home and the bank complaint is still not resolved.  The boys have been fantastic company and I wouldn’t have found it as easy to keep going without them both.

I started some studies using Massive Open Online Courses (MOOCs) and have met people worldwide which has been both amazing and scary.  One of those people was that special person.  I am sad that he has gone but happy that in a few short months we had a friendship filled with sharing, laughter and open communication – we both knew that we chatted because we each wanted to and there were no taboo topics of conversation.  I finally succeeded in not placing any conditions on another person and I have never missed someone so greatly when we were not actually chatting.

After he died some friends seem to have faded away – not sure whether they cannot cope with my feelings or they don’t know how to respond.  I always miss friends when this happens but I am not chasing after them so if they are choosing to walk a different path I wish them well and hope they will be happy.

Overall I have  a lot to be thankful for and this song has really stuck out for me these past few days …

There are two people I would love to share this with … but one of them I no longer can and the other, having shared the journey through life and grief for  a few weeks has now struck out on his own path … I will let my thankful heart sing out the song in the hope that he might hear it and know it is from me.

“Thankful”

Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can’t see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can’t see.
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There’s so much to be thankful for.

Look beyond ourselves
There’s so much sorrow
It’s way too late to say
I’ll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It’s so long overdue

So for tonight we pray for 
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can’t see
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There’s so much to be thankful for.

Even with our differences 
There is a place we’re all connected
Each of us can find each other’s light

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for 
What we still can’t see
It’s up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more

There’s so much to be thankful for

Part of the reason I am able to be thankful despite the struggles is because I set out to find and learn from Serenity.  It has helped immensely and I have  aboard on Pinterest to keep reminding me of this.  For 2014 my OLW is “Successful” and I already have a board to represent this.  My dreams and plans of starting the hostel are still there but so are the challenges to overcome in getting started – including someone else considering purchasing the building.  I have to focus on getting some income and then hope I can still proceed with the hostel but if that building goes I can at least adapt my plan to another community, although that will feel sad after I have fought so hard to stay in this community.

So farewell 2013 … and bring it on 2014.  And to each of you (as they say hereabout) Lang may your lum reek …

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A Mad Sad World …

If you joined me yesterday I ended pondering how to retrieve some serenity after Toxic’s latest outburst.  Before I could set that in motion this morning I had a visitor.  Having just finished breakfast (which takes a long time with Pup to supervise between toasty bites) I was still in my PJs and unwashed.  The person at the door was also still in their PJs and dressing gown; this person is from my community and so I opened the door and she almost knocked over me and Dog as she pushed her way in.  She was only semi coherent and kept starting her sentences and then changing them.

I know that she suffers from Bipolar disorder and it was fairly obvious to me she is in the throes of a manic episode … in her this often presents as religious zeal and a belief that she can right the wrongs of the world.  She wants to have  another go at righting the wrong done three years ago that I mentioned in my post on 2 December she wants to make the Minister and others involved apologise to me.  I have told her in the past that I am not seeking an apology I have walked away because too many have been hurt and it must stop now.  I repeated this gently since it was obvious she is not herself.  I would have liked to ask if she had missed some medication or was aware of her mania but I don’t feel I know her well enough to ask something so personal.

She wanted me to go to the church with her this morning so she could have the wrong righted.  I said I would not be going and she then tried to get me to go to a different church and I told her I did not wish to attend any organised church and felt I would likely never do so; faith sustains me but religion no longer does.  She departed to get dressed saying if I changed my mind … Read More…

Responsible Volunteering …

Virtually my entire adult life I have been a volunteer; there are lots of reasons which I will summarise in a minute but what I really want to blog about is how differently a volunteer and an employee behave and are treated and why.

My current voluntary role is as a Community Councillor; for around 5 years I have spent several hours on the last Wednesday of most months at our regular meetings.  Why? well this comes down to what Community means and how the concept of community can be sustained in the modern world.

Yes, we have put people on the Moon … but did that really do much for most of us?  Not everything technology based is necessarily a huge advance for humankind, however we can be certain of one thing in the UK and particularly in rural areas – population changes are threatening our status quo.   Read More…

Day 14: 23 September 2012

Out with the dog just after sunrise on my last day of holiday … what a serene start to the day.  Totally still, mist rolling in the Strath to the south so the tree tops pop up like floating islands … a nip in the air because it has been clear overnight … a heavy dew (not quite frost) on shaded grass and lovely gentle colours in the sky. Read More…

Day 11: 20 September 2012

Day 11 has been a different day – I had a meeting to slot in back home – so I was out on my travels this morning and it felt wrong going home so early … anyway this is what I did.

Weather guru was back on duty this morning – our weather forecasts disagreed but that turned out to be a location based discrepancy!  either side of the Tay had different weather today … but on both sides it was dreich* in fact on my first crossing over the Road bridge there was no wind whatsoever – the Silvery Tay was more like the Grey Millpond! Read More…

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