Toxicity

Well I have often talked about him so I thought I would share an example with you:

Over a week ago Toxic asked me if I would like a new silicon protective cover for my new iPhone – when he ordered one for his they sent him the wrong version and then didn’t want it back when they sent the replacement.  I said thank you it would be appreciated because I do like to look after my phones.

A week ago he had a 90 minute break in the afternoon.  I had to go into Forfar so had suggested on the Saturday that he meet me for  a short walk during Monday’s break.  I heard nothing for 48 hours and then when I was getting organised Monday morning asked him if he was meeting me and he said no.  I went about my day and got everything else done.  Later that evening he texted that he was passing the house and I could go stand outside and he would drop it off.  I replied I was busy.  Evenings are not very convenient for me because of dog feeding, going out for pees etc and because I don’t want to crate the pup to pop outside for a few minutes.

Tuesday Toxic again said he was passing I could pop out and collect the phone cover – I wasn’t here the first time and was busy the second time.  Same thing on Wednesday.  Thursday I knew he would be passing since I had seen him at work even though it was his day off – but he never let on until I asked if that was because he had worked out I was not chasing round after him or because he was pretending not to be at work (in the past he has earned overtime and not ‘declared’ it for his budgeting).

Friday he as off and started a conversation about his budget – had to say it would have to wait since I was in a meeting; eventually had that conversation late Friday afternoon; eventually he had admitted a shortfall in his savings account which is supposed to be focused on big bills like Car Services and new tyres.  I reminded him that whilst it is his money and he can use it as he sees fit he would not be able to meet the big bills if he continued to fritter it.  That ended the conversation and I have heard nothing further until lunchtime today.

Again a text saying he would be passing and I could go out for the phone cover and what was the weather.  I had just got back from half a dog walk -0 it was so bitterly cold in the wind we turned round because I could not feel my hands or my feet!  I said I was not crating Pup just to go stand outside and freeze.  Now bearing in mind that I never questioned his lack of meeting me last week I got the third degree about why I couldn’t just go out.  When I explained and reminded him that he couldn’t be bothered when he had a chance I got accused of starting an argument!

So now he is sulking because he is trying to do something nice (give me a free phone cover) and I am being difficult!  When I think of all the times I have gone out of my way to find him to deliver a little snack or to get him a book he wanted but couldn’t get … well no more but I will resist the temptation to sink to his level and tell him this!

I have been busy with applications and stuff today and trying to keep topped up with hot beverages – which meant lots of visits to the bathroom 😦

I have had a silly Dog who wanted to sit outside this afternoon right through till his tea time; I kept bringing him in and he kept asking to go back out.  After the last half our sit out he was so cold he was shaking as he ate his tea so he got his bean bag coat popped on for an hour until he warmed back up.  Now I have  silly Pup who is being a nuisance and is restless … roll on bedtime!

We are forecast to keep having snow top ups for the next fortnight – hope it is not this bitingly cold all that time; I can’t be doing with it!  Oh well – another application to do before bed time … at least Toxic is being  quiet now so hopefully Pup will settle soon and I can have peace and quiet!

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About nonehpets

I have an interest in how interior design and adapting a home to support living independently for longer can be complementary. The blog Life Long Design is part of an holistic plan for establishing a social enterprise which will offer the people of Tayside opportunities to explore Telecare and the wider scope of assistive technologies. Enabling individuals to make more informed and responsible choices in the care and support they need in their independent living. I am also keen to see public transport more widely adopted and sustainable rural bus services in particular supported. The Blog Travels with a Megarider shares my journey to find serenity in my life as I make that transition form employment to social entrepreneur. One of my methods in increasing serenity is to travel as many miles as I can on a fixed price bus ticket and explore my own local places of interest. Places that I used to go past and had never stopped to look at; places of peace and tranquility; places where I have had some wonderful conversations with complete strangers. I would like to share with you a response to when I described that one paragraph in an e-mail made it sound simple: "Believe me, Cathy, it does not sound simple. You are taking on an incredible challenge for all the right reasons. It is ambitious and admirable - the sort of project that can change lives, including yours." He is right it is ambitious but when did we every achieve anything by settling for the status quo and ignoring what doesn't work for people? So I would welcome your company from time to time on this journey either simply as a reader or if you are brave enough adding your own thoughts to the comments as you feel moved.

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